MARRIAGE: Pray Without Ceasing

Having gone through the previous edition that emphasised the need to forgive one another, it is  important that we look at prayers. There are couples that have tried many things just to have peace in their homes but to no avail, it is not that they do not want peace but they cannot explain what is actually wrong. These marriage series will therefore end on a prayer note.

Pray Continually          1 Thessalonians 5:17 (NIV)

God’s word says, pray continually, do not be tired of praying. If you give up on other efforts, do not give up on prayers. God answers prayers. God wants our happiness, that is why we are admonished to pray always. When we pray, we are focusing on what God can do and not what is happening to our spouse. I perceive that the spouse of someone reading this edition is sick and the sickness is threatening the marriage. If you are the one, BELIEVE THAT GOD WILL HEAL YOUR SPOUSE IN JESUS’ NAME. AMEN. Do not quit the marriage.

Up till this time you have not asked a (single) thing in My Name (as presenting all that I AM); but now ASK AND KEEP ON ASKING AND YOU WILL RECEIVE, so that your joy (gladness, delight) may be full and complete.

                                                         John 16:24 (AMP)

Keep asking until your joy is full. Do not quit! You will receive when you do not stop praying in Jesus’ name. God will restore joy to the home of anyone  that has challenges  threatening the unity of the marriage. The Holy Spirit will move in Jesus’ name just believe that God is able to give peace to your home. Let there be peace and healing to the broken hearted in Jesus’ name. Amen.

If God has ministered to you through these editions on marriage, just pray this prayer- Lord Jesus, come into my marriage and save it. As God restored the marriage of a woman that was abandoned by her husband for nineteen years God will also touch yours even if it is a case of divorce, because GOD HATES DIVORCE. I look forward to receiving your testimonies in JESUS’ NAME. AMEN. SHALOM.

MARRIAGE: Forgive One Another

The last edition on marriage was to admonish us and also encourage us to read. Reading is an essential aspect of life. All men that succeed in one area or the other know what others do not know. Knowledge on different matters secures the informed on such matters. To be knowledgeable is to be informed and to be informed is to be strengthened to face future challenges and celebrations.

Therefore my people are gone into captivity, because they have no knowledge: and their honourable men are famished, and their multitude dried up with thirst.

                                                                                               Isaiah 5:13

A few homes are in captivity today because the ADEQUATE knowledge needed for sustenance of peace is not there and the only way to become free is to know the truth which is God’s word. Any couple that desire or pray to have a peaceful home must know the importance of FORGIVENESS as a tool of unity.

And become useful and helpful and kind to one another, tenderhearted(compassionate,understanding,lovinghearted),FORGIVING ONE ANOTHER (readily and freely), as God in Christ forgave you.

                                                     Ephesians 4:32 (AMP)

The role of forgiveness in marriage cannot be overlooked. There is an adage in Africa that says “the tongue and mouth quarrel, but they resolve it without departing from each other”. The tongue and mouth could be likened as the wife and husband; it means that even when there are misunderstandings, they have a way of resolving their issues. One of such ways is through forgiving each other. I am quite sure that we do offend one another in life but how well have we taken a reasonable step to resolve the issues? To forgive means to cease to feel angry or bitter. It is a combination of two words ‘fore’ and ‘give’. Fore- before while give-cause to have, in other words, ‘fore-give’ implies that before anything is done wrong by your spouse you have already caused him/her to be pardoned. The moment you say ‘Yes, I do’, it implies that you have said I forgive her/him of whatever wrong she/he has done and also what she/he may do wrong. That is why it is essential to exercise openness in relationships.

I also know that it hurts when our loved ones offend us but for the sake of God’s word that says ‘I HATE DIVORCE’ (Malachi 2:16) let us hold on and allow God’s love to fill our hearts in place of hatred to our spouses, However, this may be difficult if Jesus is not in your heart. Open the door of your heart to Jesus; He is the prince of peace. I know that God will restore homes that are going through difficult periods if only you give Jesus the opportunity. Whatever your spouse might have done to wrong you, please FORGIVE. Let me share this story from my coming book titled ‘The Father’s Intent’. The story was shared via a radio presenter and I believe it will be of help. Anytime I remember this story, I imagine how a man can also demonstrate true love and forgiveness to his spouse.

In preparation for marriage, a young man visited the home town of his would be wife where he met the brothers of the lady. They welcomed him and ushered him into a room. Then the brothers called their sister and offered her the sum of fifteen thousand naira (Nigerian currency) to have her fiance for food. After a little resistance, she agreed and handed over the man to them. They tied him naked to a tree with fire being prepared for his roasting, but God showed up. All of a sudden the police came and rounded up everybody because that was not the first time such wicked act was carried out. However, the interesting part of this was that after about three weeks of the incident, the lady came looking for the man and apologised for her wrong doing. The man forgave her and as at the time the story was narrated the couple had gotten two children. Hmmm! Did you say God forbid? Of course, it may be tasking, nonetheless have MERCY and FORGIVE your spouse; perhaps your spouse did not do such a terrible thing to you. Please kindly remember how you cared for him/her at the beginning. A minister of God once said we need to develop ‘blind eyes and deaf ears’ in order to be at peace with one another. It means that we ought not to always react to what we hear or see.

Perhaps she/he had said negative things to you, FORGIVE and move on there is still joy ahead if only you close your ears and eyes to things that disturb the peace of the home.

And whenever you stand to pray, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him and let it drop (leave it, let it go), in order that your Father Who is in heaven may also forgive you your (own) failings and shortcomings and let them drop.

But if you do not forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your failings and shortcomings.

                                                          Mark 11:25-26 (AMP)

God wants us to pardon our spouses so that He will be delighted in us, thereby forgiving us of our own shortcomings. Be merciful enough to forgive your spouse. Unforgivness will hinder the prayers that are necessary for the turn around. The Lord shall shed in our hearts His love in Jesus’ name. Amen. The next edition will be on PRAYERS. I believe God will surely restore joy to many marriages in Jesus’ name. Amen.

MARRIAGE: It's Not Over Yet

This is a follow up to ‘Foundational Understanding’ of what marriage entails. The Lord’s intent is that everyone gets it right. Even if the marriage does not start right there is remedy for it. People have all manner of experiences in marriage: sweet and sour (If not properly managed). For some, their marriage lasted for a few years and a few lasted within months of commencement. Anytime I ponder on this recent development of divorce or separation it baffles me. A friend of mine found himself in a marital mess and felt he had made a grave mistake to have married his wife, but the Lord told me to tell him that he should not conclude yet. Let me also say to anyone in such situation, please do not conclude yet.

And when they came to Marah, they could not drink of the waters of Marah, for they were bitter: therefore the name of it was called Marah.

And the people murmured against Moses, saying, What shall we drink?

And he cried unto the LORD; and the LORD shewed him a tree, which when he had cast into the waters, were made sweet: there he made for them a statue and an ordinance, and there he proved them.

                                                                                         Exodus 15:23-25

The children of Israel found themselves in a sour condition because their thirst for refreshment and comfort was met with ‘bitter waters’. They thought all was over, but God showed Moses a tree, which when he cast into the waters, the waters were made sweet. This tree is what I call a ‘tree of life’. A tree that can turn a sour situation to sweet; this ‘tree of life’ can be referred to as wisdom.

Blessed is the man who finds WISDOM, and the man who gets understanding.

For the profit from it is better than the gain from silver, and its produce more than fine gold;

She is more precious than rubies; and all the things you can desire are not to be compared with her.

Length of days is in her right hand; and in her left hand, riches and honour.

Her ways are ways of pleasantness, all her paths are peace

She is A TREE OF LIFE to those who lay hold upon her; and happy is everyone who keeps her.

                                                                              Proverbs 3:13-18 (MKJV)

Tree of life can change the situation no matter its state but it is to those who lay hold upon her. Your marriage can take shape again on the condition that you lay hold on the tree of life which is wisdom. I mean the wisdom which is of God.

But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.

                                                                                     1 Corinthians 1:24

For marriage to be successful in truth there is need for God’s wisdom who is Christ Jesus. Knowing well that Christ is the Word of God. You cannot despise God’s word IF you want a good marriage. For this edition, I need to show you the first thing Jesus said in response to seekers of divorce or separation.

And the Pharisees came to Him, tempting Him and saying to Him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?

And He answered and said to them, HAVE YOU NOT READ that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female”

                                                                            Matthew 19:3-4 (MKJV)

There was a challenge on ground that perhaps calls for a ‘quick solution’- Divorce. Quite a number of couples are also seeking quick solution; they want to run away from their marital vows- for better for worse (though a few churches are changing that even though it does not change the situation). However, Jesus the Wisdom of God said “HAVE YOU NOT READ? It means there is the need to read. Read books that can help. Read the Bible, the very Word of God. If you are the husband, read about behaviours at different stages of life and the woman should do same. Do you know that women’s attitudes could be annoying at the early stage of pregnancy? That is why you need to read. Read, about women’s interests, passion and the way they reason. Most often our wives do not intend to hurt us; we get angry because we have not read about some of these things. Likewise women should take time to read about what a man wants. There are several books written by good Christian authors on marriage that can help. Please do not despise reading; you may not know all about your spouse but reading specific books can unveil his or her kind of person.

Reading does not stop at courtship period. It should be a continuous process because your spouse grows daily. The way, he or she thinks also varies with age. May I chip this in from what I have read about marriage?

“I hate divorce”, says the LORD God of Israel. “I hate it when one of you does such a cruel thing to his wife. Make sure that you do not break your promise to be faithful to your wife”

 Malachi 2:16 (GNB)

God hates divorce, so do not conclude yet that it is over. God can still heal whatever wound you have in your heart. Just give God the chance by embracing His wisdom through READING the Bible and other relevant books that matter to your home. Jesus still cares about your home. It shall be well again in Jesus’ name. Amen. SHALOM.

In the next edition we will go further into the Word of God. Hold on!

MARRIAGE: Foundational Understanding



Marriage is a sacred institution ventured into physically, emotionally and psychological by matured people. Once you say ‘Yes, I do’ it means the journey into an unending race (except for death) has begun. It is therefore expedient that the wise should be prepared for it.

For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he has sufficient to finish it?                                                                                                                                

                                                                                               Luke 14:28

 

The challenges being faced in some marriages is because quite a number of spouses did not ‘sit down first’. To ‘sit down first’ is to put into consideration the kind of person you want to marry: the belief, behaviour and background. Who is the person? Is he or she a child of God? If yes, are you medically or in some cases intellectually compatible? These are questions that need to be answered. Then ‘count the cost’. It means IF I go into marriage with the said person, what are the expectations which could be the celebrations and the challenges. It is important to note this because all marriages are packed with both celebrations and challenges. The celebrations always start with the wedding ceremony and the honeymoon. If care is not taken, the couple forget that there are challenges ahead.

The issue of marriage is not what is done haphazardly or half way. It is a God given assignment that must be FINISHED. Thus, it is only at death that man finishes his/her God’s given assignment. Jesus only said “It is finished” at the point of death (John 19:30) and same applies to marriage. This is clearly stated in the marriage vows- Till death do us part. This is what it means to finish God’s purpose for marriage. You do not ‘finish marriage’ when you have given birth to children neither do you, because of sicknesses, lack or fear of the unknown. That is why the Bible says, sit down first and count the cost, and then ask yourself this question ‘Do I have sufficient means to finish it?’

Is the person you want to get married to an agressive fellow? Is he or she a violent person? If yes, do you have sufficient means to stay together till death do you part? This is worth pondering on. Quite a number of people have found themselves in this mess and do not know what to do. Others have opted out of their marriages seeking temporary solutions.

However, it is not yet over, if you have found yourself in such mess. God is a repairer of broken homes and emotions. The purpose of this write up is to see God touch homes, as well as release His peace to such homes. This write up is as a result of the burden I have from the Lord that quite a number of people are in marital mess: Husbands and wives living like Cat and Dog, while a few are separated and thinking of divorce. The solution is to hold on; God will heal your homes in Jesus’ name. Amen. Let us believe God together for the restoration of peace to homes.

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. (NLT).

                                                                                                         Matthew 11:28

The next two editions will also be on marriage and I know God will do something. Shalom.

 

Where Are The Prophets?

Back in the 80s, a Nigerian reggae musician sang the song 'where are the prophets? We remember the Prophets. Where are the Prophets?’ To me this was just melodious and nothing more. However, as I grew up I understood that beyond the melody was a cry for divine intervention.

Where there is no prophetic vision the people cast off restraint, but blessed is he who keeps the law.

                                                                                                 Proverbs 29:18 (ESV)

People all over the world have cast off restraint. There is no guidance and most people do as they please, irrespective of the law. There are acts of terrorism and oppression. Nations are in dilemma seeking for ways out of various predicaments. Men, women and children are dying because of starvation, sicknesses and diseases; the souls of many are yearning for deliverance. Then I remembered the song and asked where are the Prophets?

It is not that the Prophets are saviours but God in His infinite wisdom has appointed some to be Prophets as gifts to men (Ephesians 4:11). A Prophet through the inspiration of the Holy Spirit gives instruction on how issues could be resolved.

  One day the people of Jericho said, "Elisha, you can see that our city is in a good spot. But the water from our spring is so bad that it even keeps our crops from growing."

He replied, "Put some salt in a new bowl and bring it to me." They brought him the bowl of salt,
 

and he carried it to the spring. He threw the salt into the water and said, "The LORD has made this water pure again. From now on you'll be able to grow crops, and no one will starve."
 

The water has been fine ever since, just as Elisha said.

                                                                                         2Kings 2:19 – 22.
 

Elisha the Prophet knew what was needed to change the situation permanently because Prophets are watchmen appointed by God to keep Cities from calamities if the word of God is obeyed. Another example is found in the New Testament where Prophet Agabus foresaw an impending danger of which the disciples overcame because of the availability of an informed Prophet (Acts 11:27-30).

SURELY GOD does NOTHING, unless He reveals His secret to His servants the prophets.

                                                                                                                         Amos 3:7
 

If the word of God says God does NOTHING unless the Prophets are informed, it means we truly need Prophets. We need sincere and honest Prophets that are not covetous. This is because the eyes of Prophets are blinded by greed and covetousness. Nonetheless, committed and sanctified Prophets are God’s choice to make known His mind to the world. It is through Prophets that nations are delivered and preserved. Their availability will quell the effects of strange storms that hit nations. As the musician sang ­­­­­­-‘where are the Prophets? We remember the Prophets. Where are the Prophets?’ May the LORD raise from amongst us men that are willing and obedient to sit at the feet of the Master in Jesus’ name. SHALOM.

And by a prophet the Lord made Israel come up out of Egypt, and by a prophet he was kept safe.  
                                                                                                                  Hosea 12:13 (BBE)