MARRIAGE: It's Not Over Yet

This is a follow up to ‘Foundational Understanding’ of what marriage entails. The Lord’s intent is that everyone gets it right. Even if the marriage does not start right there is remedy for it. People have all manner of experiences in marriage: sweet and sour (If not properly managed). For some, their marriage lasted for a few years and a few lasted within months of commencement. Anytime I ponder on this recent development of divorce or separation it baffles me. A friend of mine found himself in a marital mess and felt he had made a grave mistake to have married his wife, but the Lord told me to tell him that he should not conclude yet. Let me also say to anyone in such situation, please do not conclude yet.

And when they came to Marah, they could not drink of the waters of Marah, for they were bitter: therefore the name of it was called Marah.

And the people murmured against Moses, saying, What shall we drink?

And he cried unto the LORD; and the LORD shewed him a tree, which when he had cast into the waters, were made sweet: there he made for them a statue and an ordinance, and there he proved them.

                                                                                         Exodus 15:23-25

The children of Israel found themselves in a sour condition because their thirst for refreshment and comfort was met with ‘bitter waters’. They thought all was over, but God showed Moses a tree, which when he cast into the waters, the waters were made sweet. This tree is what I call a ‘tree of life’. A tree that can turn a sour situation to sweet; this ‘tree of life’ can be referred to as wisdom.

Blessed is the man who finds WISDOM, and the man who gets understanding.

For the profit from it is better than the gain from silver, and its produce more than fine gold;

She is more precious than rubies; and all the things you can desire are not to be compared with her.

Length of days is in her right hand; and in her left hand, riches and honour.

Her ways are ways of pleasantness, all her paths are peace

She is A TREE OF LIFE to those who lay hold upon her; and happy is everyone who keeps her.

                                                                              Proverbs 3:13-18 (MKJV)

Tree of life can change the situation no matter its state but it is to those who lay hold upon her. Your marriage can take shape again on the condition that you lay hold on the tree of life which is wisdom. I mean the wisdom which is of God.

But unto them which are called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God, and the wisdom of God.

                                                                                     1 Corinthians 1:24

For marriage to be successful in truth there is need for God’s wisdom who is Christ Jesus. Knowing well that Christ is the Word of God. You cannot despise God’s word IF you want a good marriage. For this edition, I need to show you the first thing Jesus said in response to seekers of divorce or separation.

And the Pharisees came to Him, tempting Him and saying to Him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?

And He answered and said to them, HAVE YOU NOT READ that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female”

                                                                            Matthew 19:3-4 (MKJV)

There was a challenge on ground that perhaps calls for a ‘quick solution’- Divorce. Quite a number of couples are also seeking quick solution; they want to run away from their marital vows- for better for worse (though a few churches are changing that even though it does not change the situation). However, Jesus the Wisdom of God said “HAVE YOU NOT READ? It means there is the need to read. Read books that can help. Read the Bible, the very Word of God. If you are the husband, read about behaviours at different stages of life and the woman should do same. Do you know that women’s attitudes could be annoying at the early stage of pregnancy? That is why you need to read. Read, about women’s interests, passion and the way they reason. Most often our wives do not intend to hurt us; we get angry because we have not read about some of these things. Likewise women should take time to read about what a man wants. There are several books written by good Christian authors on marriage that can help. Please do not despise reading; you may not know all about your spouse but reading specific books can unveil his or her kind of person.

Reading does not stop at courtship period. It should be a continuous process because your spouse grows daily. The way, he or she thinks also varies with age. May I chip this in from what I have read about marriage?

“I hate divorce”, says the LORD God of Israel. “I hate it when one of you does such a cruel thing to his wife. Make sure that you do not break your promise to be faithful to your wife”

 Malachi 2:16 (GNB)

God hates divorce, so do not conclude yet that it is over. God can still heal whatever wound you have in your heart. Just give God the chance by embracing His wisdom through READING the Bible and other relevant books that matter to your home. Jesus still cares about your home. It shall be well again in Jesus’ name. Amen. SHALOM.

In the next edition we will go further into the Word of God. Hold on!